We have never spoken to a wife who enjoyed living with an unhappy husband. One who is evasive, non-communicative and emotionless.

Some wives would prefer to have an argument than to experience silent treatment.

To make matters worst, most wives do not know how to help their unhappy husbands, resulting in them also becoming unhappy, frustrated, withdrawn, depressed and even suicidal. These are only behaviors that make a terrible situation worst. Let's look at five things you can do when a husband says he is unhappy. We call them self-help marriage therapy techniques.

1. Show Gratitude / Appreciation

A proven remedy to cure an unhappy husband is gratitude. Always try to use phrases such as: I really appreciate how hard you work for the family. I don't know what I would do without you. Honey, thanks for taking out the garbage or Honey, thanks for being such a great father to our children. I really enjoy your company.

These are words that can brighten the dullest of days. However, we seldom use them because it is easier to treat our husbands the same way they treat us. Never do this to an unhappy spouse.

Decide that this week you will show your gratitude in the words you say and the things you do.

2. A Heart to Heart Letter

Sometimes it can be very difficult to verbally express exactly how we feel because we allow our emotions to get in the way. I have found that a great method of letting your spouse know how much you are hurting inside is by putting it down on paper. Just ensure that you are not being condemning or pointing fingers. What needs to come across is your heart and not your frustration.

3. Do Not Nag

Most wives do not realize it but they actually contribute to their husband's unhappiness. The most unappealing trait a wife can possess is that of a nagger. You complain about everything, always point out the negatives and push your husband into a deeper depression. Also, if you talk a lot you may want to gauge how much you say. Be reasonable and remember that your husband does not need to hear every detail about what you are thinking or feeling.

We have seen some husbands who are totally unhappy around their wives but extremely happy and communicative around friends. 

4. Know Which Button To Push

We all have a button to push to get our minds off what is bothering us and focus on the most important thing in this life, "our family". Find out what your husband's button is.

Get started by observing what stresses him, then pay attention to how he reacts when you, your children or another family member does something that causes him some amount of joy (even if it is short lived). This may require a lot of trial and error for a while, but after you have found that button, use it as often as possible.

5. Do Fun Things As A Couple

The daily routines of life can become mundane and sap anyone's joy. Not to mention the financial crunch that causes most of us to have several jobs or work overtime, just to make ends meet. We wonder how we are going to pay the mortgage, send the kids to school and the list goes on. But despite all of that we need to make time for each other.

Do not wait for your spouse to plan special romantic activities. Take the initiative. E.g. A romantic candle light dinner at home. If you have kids ask a family member or friend to keep them for the night. Go for ice-cream, just the two of you etc.